Talk of the Town Dupage

Enjoyed this….

Tax his land, Tax his bed, Tax the table at which he’s fed.
Tax his tractor, Tax his mule, Teach him taxes are the rule.
Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts anyway!
Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat. Tax his ties, Tax his shirt, Tax his work, Tax his dirt.
Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his cigars, Tax his beers, If he cries tax his tears.
Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways to tax his ass.
Tax all he has, Then let him know, That you won’t be done till he has no dough.
When he screams and hollers, Then tax him some more, Tax him till he’s good and sore.
Then tax his coffin, Tax his grave, Tax the sod in which he’s laid.
Put these words Upon his tomb, ‘Taxes drove me to my doom…’
When he’s gone, Do not relax, Its time to apply the inheritance tax.

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax,
Fuel permit tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Interest expense
IRS Interest Charges
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road usage taxes
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax
Telephone federal universal service fee tax
Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes
Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax
Telephone state and local tax
Telephone usage charge tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax
School sports activity Tax

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world. We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.
What Happened?

Please feel free to add your opinion.

Heidi is the proprietor of a bar in Detroit.  In order to increase sales, she
decides to allow her loyal customers – most of whom are unemployed alcoholics -
to drink now but pay later. She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger
(thereby granting the customers loans).

Word gets around about Heidi’s drink-now pay-later marketing strategy and
as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Heidi’s bar and soon
she has the largest sale volume for any bar in Detroit.

By providing her customers’ freedom from immediate payment demands, Heidi
gets no resistance when she substantially increases her prices for wine and
beer, the most consumed beverages. Her sales volume increases massively.

A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognizes these customer
debts as valuable future assets and increases Heidi’s borrowing limit.

He sees no reason for undue concern since he has the debts of the alcoholics as
collateral. At the bank’s corporate headquarters, expert traders transform
these customer loans into DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS.

These securities are then traded on security markets worldwide. Naive investors
don’t really understand the securities being sold to them as AAA secured
bonds are really the debts of unemployed alcoholics.

Nevertheless, their prices continuously climb, and the securities become the
top-selling items for some of the nation’s leading brokerage houses.

One day, although the bond prices are still climbing, a risk manager at the
bank (subsequently fired due his negativity), decides that the time has come to
demand payment on the debts incurred by the drinkers at Heidi’s bar.

Heidi demands payment from her alcoholic patrons, but being unemployed they
cannot pay back their drinking debts. Therefore, Heidi cannot fulfill her loan
obligations and claims bankruptcy.

DRINKBOND and ALKIBOND drop in price by 90%. PUKEBOND performs better,
stabilizing in price after dropping by 80 %. The decreased bond asset value
destroys the banks liquidity and prevents it from issuing new loans.

The suppliers of Heidi’s bar, having granted her generous payment
extensions and having invested in the securities are faced with writing off her
debt and losing over 80% on her bonds. Her wine supplier claims bankruptcy, her
beer supplier is taken over by a competitor, who immediately closes the local
plant and lays off 50 workers.

The bank and brokerage houses are saved by the Government following dramatic
round-the-clock negotiations by leaders from both political parties.

The funds required for this bailout are obtained by a tax levied on employed
middle-class non-drinkers.

Funny animation for anyone who’s had trouble printing documents:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQGtucrJ8hM&feature=dir